
1/9/11
I wonder if I’ll be seeing you all at the annual DAWGdogs Fun Day Dog Show on Sunday?
I hope so although I suspect that Helen will no doubt find many excuses have many good reasons not to take me.
The primary reason I suppose, is that I’d win all of the events and the other dogs would get jealous. Quite obviously I’d be the best at everything as I’m Top Dog.
Ahh! I can picture it now, bowing humbly on the podium whilst being showered with applause, rosettes, bonios and wolf-ette whistles from the adoring crowd, my broad shoulders hung with dozens of multi-coloured ribbons bearing such noble honours as:
The Best Dog Ever !
The Dog With The Most Bonios Ever !
The Most Handsome Dog Ever !
The Most Modest Dog Ever !
The Dog Who Barks The Loudest !
The Dog With The Cleanest Ears 2011 !
The Dog Who Looks Most Like Himself !
The Dog Who You Have Least Likelihood Of Getting To Wear Fancy Dress Without Sustaining A Nasty Bite !
The Dog Who Stole The Most Cakes From The Cake Stall 1997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009 2010 2011 !
The Dog Who Has Just Caused The Most Destruction To The Agility Ring !
The Most Dastardly Dog Ever !
The Only Dog So Unhomeable That Helen Was Forced To Keep Him Herself !
The Dog Who Has Started The Most Fights !
The Dog Who Has Snaffled The Most Lunches That Didn’t Belong to Him!
The Dog Who Has To Wait Longest For His Dinner !
The Dog Who Has To Do The Most Chores !
Oh Dear Chores… that’s a point – if Helen does take me along I’ll probably be expected to work in my Security role, with my DAWGdog Security Hi-Viz vest on. Manning Dogging the gate, overseeing the parking, admitting my banned mates for a Bonio under the paw when the coast is clear, turning away riff-raff, biting anyone I don’t like the look of, that sort of thing.
Hmmm, I don’t fancy having to work all day, especially as it is on my Bin Day and I’ll have get up very early. Keep Sunday Special!
Spike will be going no doubt.
Spike always goes because he fawns a lot he is always very nice to all the other dogs and everyone who meets him and makes a fuss of them.
Smeagol Jackson will also no doubt be going so that people can see that he is far more friendly in the flesh than his photos would have you believe.
He might even meet someone who falls in love with him and offers him a home.
Actually Helen might ‘accidentally’ leave him behind for that very reason…..
Maybe we could set up a petition to make sure I can come along?
I bet if Mark was coming I’d be allowed to come to keep an eye on him and stop him getting into trouble whilst Helen was busy meeting people and dogs and judging events and handing out prizes and buying up all the cakes from the cake stall before anyone else gets there so that she can eat all of them herself again like she did last year.
Then again ….
if I’m left alone at the Rescue there will be lots to do…
My dinners and treats to scoff guard…!
The other dogs’ dinners and treats to scoff guard…!!
Helen’s dinners and treats to scoff guard…!!!
A blissful few hours of peace and quiet in
my big comfy bed without Spike and Jackson constantly hogging it…!
or actually even better …!!
A blissful few hours of peace and quiet in
Helen’s comfy bed whilst she’s guaranteed not to be able to catch me at it!!!
I’m rather looking forward to it all again now!